You Won’t BELIEB What This Monkey Has Done Without the Biebs

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You Won’t BELIEB What This Monkey Has Done Without the Biebs

Remember in 2013 when Justin Bieber had a pet capuchin named Mally? For five weeks, the baby monkey was the star of Bieber's Instagram feed, until he was abandoned at a German airport when Bieber couldn't produce the proper documentation for the customs officials.

monnkey 1

Image Source: Instagram

While abandoning a little creature is totally reprehensible, most think Mally is much better off without Justin. Can you imagine what it must be like to witness a month's worth of Bieber antics?

Mally now lives with a capuchin family at the Serengeti Safari Park, a few hours north of Berlin. While he still likes to cuddle with the teddy bear Justin gave him, Mally is happy to leave his rock star days behind him.

monnkey 2

Image Source: The Dodo

Here are just a few of the things we imagine Mally has done since saying auf wiedersehen to Justin Bieber.

1. He enjoyed a quiet night in by the fire...for once:

monnkey 3

2. He hung out, in disguise, and caught up on the latest gossip with his BFF (and Justin's ex) Selena Gomez:

monnkey 4

Image Source: Daily Mail

3. He wrote a NY Times bestselling book:

monnkey 5

Source: Instagram

4. He met his idol, Crystal (from Night at the Museum and The Hangover Part II):

monnkey 6

Image Source: The Guardian

5. Went on a NON booze-cruise and got some color:

monnkey 7

Image Source: USA Today

6. Became a French pastry chef:

monnkey 8

Image Source: Florian

7. He finally caught up on Orange is the New Black:

monnkey 9

Image Source: WBEZ TV

8. Took that photography class he'd been talking about:

monnkey 10

Image Source: UK Telegraph

9. Starred on Broadway with his [other] idol, Patti LuPone:

monnkey 11

Image Source: NPR

Clearly, Mally is living the dream. Now here's the real question—did he have any spare time to contribute any good material for Justin's Comedy Central Roast?

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